Fights and disagreements are a part and parcel of our lives once we’ve been dating or married, whether they are major (like how much money we should be spending versus conserving) or minor (like when they forget to unload the dishwasher!). However, going through a difficult time is not the same as being in an unhappy marriage or a relationship.
It’s completely normal to occasionally feel sad in a relationship. But if there’s a dramatic increase in the frequency and length of our feelings to the point where our lives are more disconnected from our significant other, that could be a sign of a worrisome transformation. Our changed body or actions such as wanting to work extra hours at the office as a deliberate attempt to delay coming home can be trying to communicate with us in a way that our mind and heart haven’t fully understood.
Partners need to ask themselves whether they believe they are in the relationship they want to be in if today were their last day? In such scenarios, we need to learn to accept that what we want really matters and that, in the end, it can be worthwhile to end our relationships if the answers are No.
Often times, depression and relationships can be interlinked too! It can be difficult to tell whether or not a relationship is contributing to emotional difficulties. This is because depression can also cause difficulty in relationships, so sometimes, the two problems may be interrelated. However, in cases where a relationship is healthy, treating the depression may improve someone’s relationship with their partner as well as their own quality of life. If a person begins treatment for depression and still feels unhappy in their relationship, it may then be a sign that the relationship itself is having an impact on their mental health.
Ultimately, a partner shouldn’t be our everything, but it’s important to feel that we are a team. When a couple doesn’t share their struggles and triumphs with one another, this leaves an ally, someone who may be one’s primary champion, in the dark on the details of their lives, making the either feel unhappy or discontented. However, just because we’re unhappy in our relationships doesn’t necessarily mean it’s time to separate, get a divorce, or end it. Therapy and frequent check-ins can likely help us in resolving certain problems lying within the connection.