All relationships have their ups and downs, but when we commit to our partners, we don’t always take into account that our in-laws might also be involved. Even though our spouses, partners, and husbands are flawless, it may still be challenging to get along with their parents and family. Why? Why do our in-laws cause us so much stress?
Well, it can be hard to set boundaries with our in-laws, but when the boundaries we do set get violated, it becomes impossible to cultivate a mutually respectful relationship. There are many reasons why our in-laws may cross our limits such as protectiveness, love and care for their child, but control is often a big one. Because they are older, they may feel that they are entitled to a certain amount of respect, but many of them often fail to remember that respect must first be shown. Thus, setting limits is essential, but keeping them intact is even more crucial when it comes to such intricate relationships.
Butting heads into personal decisions, freezing out of the conversations, being passive aggressive, appearing unannounced at the doorstep, turning the spouses against each other into a blame game, smothering affection that could turn restrictive, being disrespectful, etc. Every situation is unique. Therefore, there may not be one concrete way to deal with an in-law without limits, but there are some solid techniques we can use to limit their impact on our relationships.
First and foremost, we need to be on the same page with our spouses in order to deal with a toxic or intrusive in-law. As any meaningful change starts with effective communication, sitting down and being open and honest with our partners about the situation without being accusatory can help. It is necessary to remember that beneficiary solutions can only come out of an understanding and peaceful approach.
Every family has some degree of dysfunction, therefore when finding answers, it is essential that we adopt a bird’s-eye perspective. Thus, having interfering in-laws or not, healthy boundaries are the core of our self-respect and hence, are also one of the foundations of any healthy relationship.
Are you dealing with such tricky situations in your life? Are you confused as to where you would find solution or a right way to go about your problem? We at Mindful Heart are always happy to be your listening ear and to help guide you seamlessly through life.